There is always a moment when the media focuses on issues of culture. It is quite common to witness the mix up between the issues of collective identity and individual identity without discernment. I've never really felt any ambivalence when I wore culturally derived clothing: that is until I decided to venture out in an assortment of head scarves.
This look was a lazy, slap it together because I missed my bus look. The weather this summer has been scorching so much so that I look forward to taking in the sharp, crisp fall air. Wearing this light knit was almost an proclamation to the sun; it needs to dissapear so my other sweater friends can join in.
Not having to worry about the state of my hair was also an added bonus. I think that my get up is usually odd enough to make one or two people in the conservative arena look twice, so staring is not that shocking: however I the question "Are you from here?" really took be aback.
I suppose in this city any kind of ornamentation that slaps you in the face with I enjoy a myriad of cultural expression also welcomes questions that seem to belong in a script: on a cliche program.
This was a day in which I ran halfway across the world's largest mall and walked in the wrong direction for 30 minutes. This should be embarrassing to admit out loud but that's the beauty of friends, even you invisible internet friends. My feasable friends waited for me for a little over an hour before we met up and dined of overly sugarly fizzy drinks and pancakes that crumbled a bit too easily.
This is not really an official post; more the accumulation of the afternoon. I think that personally I don't spend enough time with friends and the like. Yes there are meet ups, texts and facebook chats however the "presentness" is something that quite a few of my own relationships are missing. More than anything I never want to look back on a friendship and wonder if I put enough work in.
I decided to wear this shirt because a) it is super light and summer friendly where my own mind isn't and would b) hide any of the accumulated tummy bloating. I promise you all that I'm wearing a skirt underneath. It just kept going north as the day went by and I stopped caring.
The rest of the afternoon was spent with raspberry green tea, chats about life and the like as well as Beattle listening.
I'd never listened to the Beattle's before in my life.
There are many risky things that one will take in their lives. When I die I can say that making a dress out almost 6 metres of cloth was one of them.
Even though one of my goodish pals had invited me to her party I hadn't made the time to buy a proper outfit. Which was ridiculous seeing as there was no colour code, the formal dress code seemingly manageable.
The biggest issue or disease that I suffer from is thinking that a new dress,purse,pair of shoes will make me a new me. The bare bones truth is that it won't. New anything, when materialistic won't change you; only a new you can change you. Much like recreating yourself when trying to pull an outfit from what you already have through chance and shopping, you have to work with what you've got (and probably thought was broken)
I will attest to the fact that I too felt that this endeavour was bordering abit on the YOURDRESSWILLFALLOFF arena however it did not; until we started dancing. Then I was pulling, tying and tucking like there was no tomorrow. This is the most skin I've ever exposed at once since I was say eight? Let's not push my luck.
Apart from not having to worry about whether another female would sport a similar dress/style I felt glad to wear something from my own heritage. Growing up far from home it's hard to muster enough brave for the questioning eyes and glances. However what I've learned as I tried to keep some culture in my dressing is that most people are simply curious. Their glances mean no harm, and if they do who cares?
I've really debated with myself about whether or not to post these images. Even though I am striving to be more honest in my posts; I am not always striving to be more open. I think that the biggest reason is that I am a blatant people person. Happy as a peach when there is energy to vibe of; if it's as mutually up and down the better! Thus the ultimate problem as you dear internet are the ultimate stranger who comes and goes in silence.
I decided to post because my friend Anna offered to take these images. A friend who braves a crowd of probably six hundred people wondering IF THEY SAW A GIRL. IN A SUIT. AT HER OWN GRADUATION deserves recognition.
I lost my camera charger right around this time and had NOTHING (except for images taken by family) to use. Luckily my dad found my charger a short while after.
I'd told myself I would take proper pictures (to show you my shoes), but never got to it because a) ruining my weave once was more than enough for me. b) exams came swiftly after to smack me in the face and brain.
Now that I'm done sounding like the biggest oxymoron ever I want to talk about why I chose to wear a suit.
First I picked the least traditional rendition of a suit because I did not want to look like I'd borrowed from the boys. More than that the idea struck me a year before and stayed stuck with me. I happened upon these trousers by luck! That is all that I can say. With the borrowed from the guys look becoming ever more popular, dare I say a trend in women's wear finding the basics of a suit became more costly as time went by with jackets going all the way to this insane price. I mean it's JUST a jacket.
I will admit that a week to my grad I was contemplating whether or not to buy a back up dress. There were many questions rattling in my skull. Would I look too manly, too dressed down, too lame, too try hard or worse like I'd just come from an office. You see how this went right?
I was nervous as soon as I arrived at the hall where the night was to commence. Sure a few compliments didn't hurt, but the dubious stares from silent classmates who usually said hi made me wary.
That is until I wondered when else am I going to graduate in a suit for the first time? So I decided to try to enjoy the rest of the night. And you know what, there are a few pluses to wearing a suit to a formal event (for anyone who is contemplating such). I did not have to worry about tripping when walking even though I walked into a balloon set up but lets blame that on the fact that I wasn't wearing any glasses or contacts.
The bathroom was easy to manouver and I was just as comfortable at 9 pm as I was at 1 am whilst burger eating with friends.
The after effect was the part I didn't expect. What gave me the most pride in sticking to my guns is when a girl in a lower grade started talking to me about my pictures. "You look better than all those sparkly b*tches" was her firm conclusion. I will and have also gotten extra mileage from these pieces after the fact; cost/wear instantly in play - economics for clothes.
If you do something out of the ordinary you might as well own it; and wear some black lipstick.
Actually, it’s like this – what use is it to hold onto something that is scattering?
Only the heart will hurt more
But I wonder, what is the purpose of living like this?
The Day Before - Nell
I wore this to meet some really old friends for dinner. Everytime I meet people I knew in the past, who knew a past me, I feel like a ghost that is haunting myself. I'm sure we can all agree that the action of self hauntage is infinitely pointless.
On this particular day the only thing I had set in stone was that I must look like a berry. I'm really picky when it comes to fruits in the berry arena just ask the strawberries that are currently dying in the fridge. So my stylistic whim of the day took me aback once I saw these images.
I think that I am adventurous when it comes to how I dress, but to be frank there are certain parameters that I follow and never leave. Dressing head to toe in colours such as these is a very feminine(ish) thing for me.
I've actually been feeling pretty stagnant in what I've been wearing these days, thus the lack of posting. I feel that I've come to a stand still in what I want to express. Shopping has now become a philisophical disaster like zone in which I wonder whether or not the cost/wear of a certain item is worth the inherent monetary cost or the dwinndling sqaure footage in my closet.
Taking a step back and observing, questioning and hopefully rediscovering ones style is something that has to be done. This may be by awkward clothes era circa the already passed awkward preteen self era.